My flat doesn't have a telephone. Which sometimes feels a little weird. Mobile phones just aren't the same are they? I want a proper phone, so I can have long conversations about nothing; just like when I was a teenager. But not any old phone will do. I want something special. Like: 
Pink donut phone circa 1970s.
A retro turn dial phone.
Tacky lip phone (and neon flamingo light!).
A Strawberry Shortcake phone!
Old school and orange.
